I am and always have been more than my cosplay.
Cosplay has given me an outlet to create, to travel, and to make new friends. It has given me opportunities I still can’t believe were real. Cosplay has taught me things about life and friendship, about community, about myself. Cosplay has caused me pain. There were small burns, eye injuries, and respiratory issues from improper ventilation. Cosplay has caused me stress and panic. It has brought me many sleepless nights and lost friendships. It has been a major part of my life for half of it. For nearly 15 years I’ve toiled away at this hobby, for better or worse.
And it feels like I’m done. I haven’t created anything new or substantial in two years. I have attended only a handful of conventions. I’ve neglected the blog. There have been no recent updates to the galleries. And I haven’t missed it in the way I thought I would.
I’m not quitting completely; it is still a part of my life in some way. It just no longer runs my life the way it used to. It’s so far removed from my day to day that I barely think about it. I have other creative outlets: knitting, cross-stitch, some painting. I miss getting excited about events and construction, but that drive just isn’t there. My step back has been a step away. I’m still around, just not taking part.
I still want to write up my neglected blog posts from past events and get the site updated and revived, but…we’ll see.